I was his caregiver so I lost my income when he passed 3 months ago. Hi Lydia, I truly feel life is over. Just before Christmas, I had to stop and tell myself this is enough. I hurt so much and no one can help me or explain why. I pray your pain will lessen in time and life has lots of good things still in store for you. We would have been married 30 years Aug. 5. I come home to a lonely house, with no one to talk to. But – as time moves on – I feel sadder, knowing it’s just that more time has passed since we were together. After your husband dies, you may forget that you’re not the only one grieving. May you find hope, healing and comfort in your day. But we were good for each other that way. I’m in the same situation as you. I was shocked by his understanding of him never replacing my husband, he stating this himself. He is alive in the memories the walls of our home hold. Any suggestions? I just miss him so much. I hurt so bad and I know God has His Reasons, but why? went through the what if’s, and everything else. I continued to try out different groups and now I have joined 2 Meetup groups that I really enjoy and I have made some good new friends. I pray to God for hope for a future with joy. I went to bed early – he was a late to bed/late sleeper. I Should be “better” by now; I should be happy that there’s a grandson now who’s supposed to, according to them, fill the void left by my husband’s death. But now I am feeling the grief for me. Our plans were to finally winter in Arizona, as I have bad arthritis, and am 62, my husband was 67. It will always be there … And when you allow yourself, try to be happy for what you had. Hi Cynthia, when I read your post I felt like I could’ve written most of it for myself too. I lost my husband on July 4, 2016. No one I have met even those who have been widowed seemed to have an experience anything like what I have been through since August 12, 2020. The only person who could’ve comforted me was the person who was gone. You get to decide the right way for you. A broken heart days go by and its hasn’t gotten better only worse my husband family has completely disowned us as well. Leslie you said that you pray to God and you may feel some comfort there, its the same connection the same love the same loving feel you will get from your loving man. Just read your article, am nearly four years down this road and still have such hard days. He developed diverticulitis very suddenly, some bacteria escaped into his bloodstream, and he turned septic, then went into septic shock. Dear Pat I realize that most of ya’ll are older but reading what has been posted definitely hit home . Connie, it has been 7 months for me. Tonight is a bad night for me. I am going along making decisions which is really difficult but I hope I am doing things the right way. Have people turned so cold. We were married 41 years, since I was 19 and he was 22. Who knows! I share your sorrow, Carol. Bills, etc. I feel guilty buying things for myself, and am totally lost without him. Larry and I lived the cocoon like you did. I’ve been so ill feeling that it’s hard to eat. Thank you for this. But I guess it does give me some comfort that what I am feeling isn’t unusual given the circumstances. Hi I just try to hit my knees every morning and every night (That’s getting harder-My knees being in not very good shape) to rest in assurance that we will be together whenever the God Lord calls me home. Kay, Hi Kay, I’m so sorry for your loss. Knowing we had done this, we could both be stronger together. I find myself in deep trouble money wise, which is adding to the stress, because he handle that. Yet not one is gender neutral, and absolutely none of them are for or about men – only women. It’s a lonely life as a widow now for about 15 months and I hate being a widow and the aloneness. I lost my beloved husband July, 2016. There are things only God understands and I trust Him. Anita and Lautie, thank you for your kind words.they do mean a lot and they do help. Life is too short as I have found out, so However long I have left I’m going to live it as I know that is what he would want me to do. If anyone has any suggestions on where to turn or what to do to start me on the right path to healing (not forgetting or “getting over”, but healing), I would appreciate it. I have a tendency to cry in church and feel embarrassed and have to leave. I mean I have friends, but when we sit down for a drink or something we talk about business or sports or activities. I talk to him all the time, I even told him tonight that sometimes I hate you for loving me so much because I don’t know now how to live without that kind of love, but I know he knows I don’t hate him. I drink wine, (evening)and I smoke. I’m not able to cope with this overwhelming loss. How are you involved in your church, neighborhood, or nonprofit organizations? My prayers are with you. He lives in your heart, mind, and soul. Anyway, they were a HUGE help. I feel so alone all the time I feel we were cheated of all our plans for retirement and very angry I have lost my best friend ,confidant,soul mate, love of my life. I often wonder if the ER had done more to save his life by being proactive, instead of letting him lie there with just pain medication – would he still be alive today? It is a nice outlet to be able to talk with other people who “get it”. Doesn’t make it any easier to accept, but we have no choice. I lost my husband of 42 yrs four months ago. The first six months are the hardest. Maybe, you will never cry over your husband’s death. She was also the one who would tell me if my socks matched; if my tie was straight, or if my hair was combed. She does have another son who lives close by. We were together 15 yrs and now it feels like 15 minutes. Its bittersweet, but the home is too large for just me. Your pain is so fresh and raw . i feel good about doing this for him and afterwards the family will have a luncheon. Good luck to you! truly. Something will always come across, you just need to notice it. Thank you for sharing. Are the growing number of cases of men being abused in some way or another by women simply to be ignored, despite the increasing frequency? Ten days…you are probably still in shock, trying to absorb the reality that your dear husband is gone. I understand the pain and disbelief you must be feeling now. It has been two years and I still don”t fell like I am doing more than going through the motions. I have just come upon this site and found fellowship with all you people who belong to the club we never expected to sign up to. I know it may sound negative, but I have honestly got to the stage where I simply will not trust people and have become incredibly private. She was able to tell me with one look if I was talking too much or saying something stupid. Having no children I am giving away the family heirlooms now, some I put in an addendum to my will. Not having the chance to take the enormity or seriousness of that fateful last trip to say how much I loved being his soulmate will hurt for sometime to come, I know he knew this, but so sad. I have a couple of friends who have invited me everywhere with them ever since and I was told never turn down an invitation so I don’t, but it is not the same. I was so so so exhausted. Slowly, I am going longer and longer periods of time with a little ray of light poking through the darkness. When you’re starting over in your 60s, allow yourself to play with the idea that a new season of your life is beginning – and it may not be as lonely or difficult as you think. Plant a shadow or shade garden; a water, sand, or secret garden. Oct 27th 2016. We would have been married 24 years in June. I have a friend whose husband died suddenly just 2 months before mine. Now I am feeling my loss as devastating. But with no autopsy, I’ll never really know why he died, and I have to carry the regret of not being with him when he passed. I guess I’m an introvert who prefers to try to work life out by myself with God’s help, and family and friends who show me love when they can. I am completely devastated and broken. In fact, I only heard that she died at all by way of a condolence text from an ex boyfriend of one of her older sisters. I have some wonderful friends who have been very kind and supportive, but I have no family locally. That truth freed me. We made it through fertility issues (never having children), family issues impacting our current lives to spend 29 years as a married couple.
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